If I Could Turn Back The Hands of Time

 

My church, All Saints Church G.R.A Enugu, celebrated the harvest of children this past sunday.

As I watched the kids’ performance in awe, I fell into a trance, more of reverie per se. I couldn’t help but remember when I was like them; how I sang sweet melodies like Panam Percy Paul’s Bring Down Your Glory with my Macy Gray-like voice and how I dazzled the church congregation with a flawless recitation of the Gospel according to John Chapter 1, I flowed like a BOSS (Huhh).

Oh Yes! I was that incorrigible cool kid your parents wanted you to be like. 

Those were memorable and happy moments I will cherish till the day I go six feet under the ground.

Childhood is the most exciting stage of our lives. I’m pretty sure most of you would love to rewind the hands of time to when he/she was as innocent as a bird, when things were less complicated, no job stress, no relationship headache and no bill to pay.

However, not everybody shares this lovely tale. Some had a dark experience and would love to leave that part of their life history in the past. Some were raped, molested and abused as kids. Others weren’t lucky and lost a parent or two to the cold hands of death early in life.

If you had the power to turn back the hands of time, what would you change/correct in your life?

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Peer Pressure: Good or Bad?

 

It is a natural phenomenon for us to copy and want to be like the people we admire in life. The struggle to fit in at all cost has made a lot of us to do what we wouldn’t do on a normal day. Peer pressure is tantamount with the youths; after all we spend most of our day in the company of friends more than our parents and siblings.

As kids, our parents choose the kids we hang out with; preferably kids of their friends. As we grow, we fight to remove the shackles our parents have on us and choose our clique of friends. Most times, we choose people who have similar interests, beliefs and experiences to ours. Together, you and your friends make decisions and influence each other every day.

Making decisions on your own and standing your ground is worrisome; but when other people are drawn in and try to pressure; it gets more worrisome. Friends affect and influence our lives even without us realizing it, just by spending time with us.

Psychologist Wendy Treynor described peer pressure as “Identity Shift Effect”. One’s state of harmony is disrupted when faced with the threat of external conflict or failing to conform to a group’s standard. Thus, we conform to the group’s standard but as soon as one does, eliminating this external conflict, internal conflict is introduced. To rid oneself of this internal conflict, an identity shift is undertaken where one adopts the group standards as one’s own, thereby eliminating internal conflict; returning one to a state of harmony.

To me, Peer Pressure is the hassle by friends for us to do something we don’t want to do. It doesn’t have to be  negative; it could also be positive .

For instance, on the negative side, most of my mates started lighting a cigarette as far back as JS2/3. Even though some didn’t want to be part of it but because they were scared to be labelled a Jew man, they gave in to peer pressure and they are hooked. Others started snubbing some people because their clique frowned at the sight of them talking with the unpopular ones alias nerds/jew men.

Positively, friends’ pressure can help us learn a lot of things like a new skill. In my primary school days, after watching soccer stars like Diego Maradona, Roberto Carlos, Raul Gonzalez and Savio; I believed left-legged players had more shot power than those who play with the right leg so I pressured my friend Chife for us to learn how to play football comfortably with both legs and we did it!

Some years ago, I had a near death experience that left me incarcerated in a hospital for some months. Then, I was an under graduate in my 400L. With exams lurking, I lost hope of writing the exams and made up my mind I was going to spend an extra year in school but my friend didn’t want to hear any of it and sent me an SMS I will never forget. She said “if there’s anybody I know that can pull this off, it’s you”. Those eleven words urged me to read and instantly, energy from nowhere sprang up in me and I started flying like those men you see in Red Bull commercials. I wrote that exam from the hospital and came out with flying colours.

As we grow older, peers naturally play a greater role in our lives. Due to the amount of time we spend together, we develop close bond with our peers and may feel so connected to them that they are like an extended family.

So do you think peer pressure is good or bad?

Did You Know?

 

Chinua Achebe was given bursary to study Medicine and Surgery at University of Ibadan but switched to English, Literature and Theology after a year.  

University of Ibadan also produced Nobel award winner Wole Soyinka, poet Christopher Okigbo, novelist Elechi Amadi and Novelist cum poet John JP Pepper Clark. If you read that yellow bible West African Verse back in the day, you would be conversant with these names.

Cyprian Ekwensi studied Pharmacy at Yaba Technical Institute, Lagos School of Pharmacy, and the Chelsea School of Pharmacy of the University of London.

The London 2012 Olympics Opening ceremony cost 27 million pounds; that of Beijing 2008 cost 64 million pounds.

Russia’s Vladimir Putin brought a large dog with him to a round of negotiations with Germany’s Angela Merkel – knowing she had a pathological fear of dogs – in order to gain a psychological edge.

You can get a heart attack from an intense orgasm.

Al Gore is the only person to have won the Grammy, Emmy, Oscar and Nobel awards.

There’s a scientific paper that proposed to classify happiness as a psychiatric disorder.

The actress who plays Talisa from “Game of Thrones” is Charlie Chaplin’s grand daughter.

Arsene Wenger pockets a whooping 7million pounds every year in wages.

J.R.R Tolkien typed the entire Lord of The Rings while using only two fingers

The gravestone J.R.R Tolkien and the wife is inscribed with “Luthien” and “Beren”. Two tragic legendary characters in LOTR who were madly in love.

The Norse god “THOR” had to dress like a woman to get his hammer back.

Eating out of boredom is a habit we develop as a toddler and re-inforce throughout our life.

Hugging and holding hands with your lover warms the heart and greatly reduces the harmful effects of stress.

Having no friends has the same effect on life expectancy as smoking 15 cigarettes everyday.

Stupidity is contagious; a study finds.

Psychologists find that exposure to awesome things is good for you.

Tug of war was once an official Olympic sport.

Over a million Europeans were taken as slaves by North Africans between 1530 and 1780.

Murphy law states that “Anything that can go wrong will go wrong”

Internet was first called “The Galactic Network” when it was created.

Wikipedia has banned all users and IP address affiliated with Church of Scientology.

A boy spent 60,000 pounds on surgery to look like Britney Spears.

Vincent Kompany turned down move to big clubs like Manchester United in his teenage years in order to complete his University education in Belgium. He recently signed up for a masters’ degree in Business Administration at Manchester Business School and will commence lectures this September.

Beyonce was home schooled, she never left her house for school; she is reportedly allergic to perfumes.

Mikel Arteta played in the same Paris Saint Germain team with Jay Jay Okocha and Ronaldinho.                                                                                                                            

Football was actually invented in China – first reports of the game can be found in writings dating from around 476BC, when it was cuju and involved players kicking a leather ball through a hole in a piece.

There is a book called “The Vagina Ass of Lucifer Nigger Bastard”

British-born, ex-Nigerian international, Efan Ekoku is the first player to score more than 3goals in an EPL match; he scored four in the 5-1 drubbing of Everton at Goodison Park in 1992.

 

Music Trivia

 

This is how the game works. I write out the lyrics of a song and you tell me the name of the artiste and the title of the song.

 

Ok..here we go!

 

“Where’s the love we had, when did it all go bad or am I just insecure? I give all I can, baby, I’m your man. Tell me what we’re in this for, remind me…”

 

“…I sat down on the street took a look at my self said, where are you going, you know the world is headed for hell? Say your goodbyes to someone you can say goodbye to…”

 

“…I can’t stay on your life support, there’s a shortage in the switch, I can’t stay on your morphine, cuz its making me itch, I said I tried to call the nurse again but she’s being a little bitch, I think I’ll get outta here…”

 

“…In spite of the way you were mocking me, acting like I was part of your property, remembering all the times you fought with me. I’m surprised it got so (far). Things aren’t the way they were before. You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore. Not that you knew me back then but it all comes back to me…”

 

“I walked across an empty land, I knew the pathway like the back of my hand. I felt the earth beneath my feet, sat by the river and it made me complete…”

 

“What is this? Numbers in your pocket. I remember when you used to throw those things away. Why do you wanna keep in touch now? Who gave you a reason? To act so shady…”

 

“…I came wrong you were right transformed your love into light;baby believe me I’m sorry I told you lies. I turned day into night…”

 

“…Now they can see the tears in our eyes but we deny the pain that lies deep in our hearts. Well maybe that’s a pain we can’t hide cause everybody knows that we’re both torn apart. Why do we hurt each other? Why do we push love away…”

 

“…With just one look and just one touch, And I knew she was the girl for me, like no other I had seen. They say I am tripping but I know what I want.

This girl here is different, she got something that they don’t. Yeah!…”

 

“Feel your heart beating fast, hold me close make it last. We knew this day would come so take a breath leave me and was so scared of you leaving. Wish we could both just run…”

 

“…I don’t conversate with chicks I ain’t gon’ hit, I don’t holla at these hoes that sing like Ashanti, body like Beyonce, face like Andre (uhhh)…”

 

“…Look at yourself now look at me you cant see a nigga I’m what you you use to be. Look at it this way you niggaz side ways, always getting money my nigaaz time pace. So fuck a nigga I’m self made. You a sucka nigga I’m self paid.This for my broke niggas.This for my rich niggas…”

 

“…The soul’s escaping, through this hole that is gaping. This world is mine for the taking. Make me king, as we move toward a new world order. A normal life is boring, but superstardom’s close to post mortem…”

 

“…Niggaz wanna try, niggaz wanna lie Then niggaz wonder why, niggaz wanna die. All I know is pain All I feel is rain. How can I maintain, with madd shit on my brain…”

 

“…Girl you know without a doubt that you got me so sprung out and I’m sitting in the club, i love the way you work it out, I’m just sipping on my drank and be popping all my ecstasy  and the way you move it girl, I’m just thinking of your sex…”

 

“…Every night, Every day, just to be there in your arms.Won’t you stay? Won’t you lay? Stay forever and ever and ever and ever…”

 

“…Baby said I like the way, I don’t think you heard me. I said I like the way you move tha thing…”

 

“…Maybe we’ll meet at a bar, he’ll drive a funky car. Maybe we’ll meet at a club and fall so deeply in love. He’ll tell me I’m the one and we’ll have so much fun. I’ll be the girl of his dreams maybe…”

 

“…It’s after midnight and she’s on your phone saying come over cause she’s all alone. I could tell it was your ex by your tone. Why is she calling now after so long…”

 

“…It’s getting late; I’m making my way over to my favourite place. I gotta get my body moving, shake the stress away. I wasn’t looking for noody when you looked my way. Possible candidate, yeah…”

 

Clue: song nos 1-5 are rock songs, nos 6-10 are R’n’B songs, nos 11-15 are rap songs and 16-20 are pop songs. Please endeavour to number your answers.

 

If you answer 14 questions (70%) correctly, you are good; if you get 10 answers right (50%), you are just there and if you get 6 or less (30%), you be confirm yeye.

 

The results will be published tomorrow and the winner(s) announced.

 

Leggo!

Male Ego Vs Female Ego

Ego is defined as a person’s self esteem; the part of the mind that is responsible for the interpretation of reality and the sense of self.

Women say all the time that men have fragile egos. They are nothing compared to the helium-balloon female ones.

Men have a flack for having an ego but I actually think women are worse. With men, if you treat them with love and respect, they will treat you like a queen but with women, they keep wanting more and more no matter how good a man treats them. That is why married women are so vulnerable to men who hit on them. They are feeling unattractive and these men play into their ego and they are hooked.

You constantly hear  how women say they are controlled by a magical force that guided them and they can’t stop. Women can’t stand not being thought of as beautiful and not being wanted so that is why they get involved with unavailable men. It is a constant quest to make a man available but once the woman  achieved her desires she no longer wants him.

This applies with my cousin’s ex and friend’s soon to be ex. My cousin wold have given his right arm for his ex but she cheated on him and said she no longer wanted to be with him. She probably thought he would beg and plead like most men in his situation would do but he left her on the spot and told her he was also fed up with their charade of a relationship.

Once the separation was over, he wanted nothing to do with her and that drove her insane. The fact that she meant nothing to him anymore got to her. When she found out she was dating another person, she went nuts.

My friend’s girlfriend cheated on him and asked for their relationship to be annulled because she needed “some space” to find herself. He begged and pleaded but no matter what he did she was determined he was the source of all her unhappiness and wanted out. One day, he got sick of trying and called up the girl and aborted the mission himself. She flipped, and accused him of being cold, uncaring and willing to fight for what they had when he tried to fight and got nowhere. After she left, he enjoyed him freedom and lack of nagging so much that he wanted to be as free as much as she did and it’s driving her up the wall.

In both cases, the man starved the woman’s ego and it greatly upset her. Women’s egos are just as bad if not worse than man’s.