Be My Valentine

image

Welcome to the week of love. This week will climax with Valentine’s Day on Sunday. Valentine’s Day is a day set aside to make a special connection with someone special.

I had great hopes for my love life this year (I still do). Unfortunately, Valentine’s Day is around the corner and I still haven’t found anyone to be romantic and mushy with on that day.

image
No try am

Some years ago, I wrote about love being overrated. How ignorant of me! I take that back. Pardon me. By the time I wrote that, I had an odeshi for all the arrows Cupid flung at me. However, a lot of things have changed since then. I have seen myself fall for a girl that I barely even know. Sounds weird, doesn’t it?

Unfortunately, she is oblivious of my existence and I am just like a teenage dirtbag.  Hello from the other side (wipes a tear). That draws me back to how my love life sucks more than Harvey Specter’s.

image
Hello from the other side
image
Cry me a river

I am still one of those single people that those in relationships believe they are lonesome and miserable, and avoid like a plague. And also ask questions like how do you single people do it? Who do you talk to when you are sad? Who cuddles you? Who asks ‘have you eaten’ or did you have a nice day?

Dependency is a habit that’s very hard to curb so single people try to embrace independence and be their own person. You see sometimes being single is better than being in a relationship. Sighs who am I kidding?

Love and relationships are one of the mysteries of the world (Proverbs 30:18-19) so these things aren’t white and black as they seem. They say “best things happen when you are not looking” so can someone tell Cupid that I have closed my eyes and he’s free to shoot another arrow of love my way and fill me with uncontrollable desire.

Now that I have made peace with Cupid, I’m hoping he will come to my rescue and put in a word for me with Aphrodite or Venus to send me a beautiful damsel (nke ukwu ya nwere nti) to be my valentine. Make I follow other people talk bae; my sex appeal de waste abeg!

image
Beautiful damsel with hips (ukwu nwere nti)

Cupid please remember to let the prospective valentine know that I don’t want singlet and boxers as gifts this year. And oh, if you can’t find me a valentine, could you find someone to deposit some money into my account atleast.

How are you celebrating your own valentine? Do you have a valentine or are you still hoping to find one? Please share your plans in the comment section.

Mental Health: A Need For Awareness

image

Mental health problems are on meteoric rise across the globe. I read an interesting article which identified mental health disorders as the fifth leading cause of death and disease worldwide. Interestingly, Nigeria, along with China, North Korea and Japan were the four countries mentioned to have low burden of death and disease from mental disorders.

This could be due to the fact that the average Nigerian mind races to madness (psychosis) probably inflicted on a person by haters from his or her village, when mental health is mentioned. Many fail to realise that alcoholism, drug abuse, eating disorders, sleep issues, emotions such as anxiety and depression, levels of stress, self-harming and suicide are all linked to mental health.

As a result, very few Nigerians pay attention to their mental health. Judging with what is happening right now, one can predict that mental health issues of Nigerians, especially the youths will skyrocket in the next five to ten years. And this should be seen as a major public health concern.

Before you start critiquing this; I am yet to research on this so I have no raw data to back my claims hence this is just an opinion, observation or assertion.

Nigerian youths are faced with numerous problems in our country today. From joblessness (unemployment) through relationship/marriage problems to alcohol and drug abuse etc. And these can do serious damage to one’s mental health.

image

First, parents put a lot of pressure on their kids to study and become a doctor, engineer or lawyer. Many may lack the abilities and capabilities required to reach the educational goals set by the parents and in the end, become stressed, anxious and depressed or may resort to drug abuse/alcoholism to take the pain away.

Then, if one scales through these hurdles and graduates, one enthusiastically applies for numerous jobs as many believe their job defines them and earns them respect. If unsuccessful after a long search, one may lose confidence and self-esteem.

Unemployment can take a huge toll on a fresh graduate’s pysche. The stages of unemployment are initial shock, depression and finally adjustment. Depression may cause them to isolate themselves from friends and family.

Next, the never-ending pressure on a young Nigerian lady, from family and society, to marry and have a family. Although many claim unfazed, being single may increase the risk of developing mental health problems in adulthood.

Nevertheless, ending a relationship/marriage through separation, divorce or death may also cause an increased risk of mental health disorders. Relationships are hard-work and often drains one’s emotional energy. People may be happier whilst married or in relationship but the effects on mental health once separated by death or divorce may be far worse than being single.

image

image

It is never easy when a relationship/marriage ends. The breakup can trigger negative emotions, such as sadness, hate, disappointment and depression, which one may never recover from. The more break-ups one has, the more his/her mental health  progressively deteriorates.

Emergence of social media hasn’t helped either; it has increased comparison, cyber-bullying, restlessness, glamorization of sex, drugs and alcohol use and crowd mentality amongst the youths to appear cool. People put more pressure on themselves when they see achievements of others thereby elevating their stress levels, anxiety and depression. If they feel they are falling behind, they may make matters worse by turning to drugs or alcohol.

Mental health issues can prevent one from living his/her dream, starting a family or becoming useful to his nation. And this should be treated as a serious health scare. Mental health awareness should be made to safeguard emotional wellbeing of Nigerian youths.

Thank you for making out time to read this article. If you have enjoyed it, please comment and share your views on this issue. Also, do like, share and follow the blog.